3 posts tagged “emotions”
i wanted to go for a walk, but decided to write something instead to vent my depression...
ah well, let's see...i think im at that point when i think maybe i should play a game to kill time and distract myself and automatically my brain tells me "these games are just linear pieces of code and you know you're gonna get frustrated within a few minutes" same with a movie, i can imagine what the movie will be like before i even start watching it...
one big problem is the fact that none of these things are being done in place of something else I'd rather be doing, e.g - studying....it's always more fun to do things like 'watching a movie' or 'playing a game' just before an exam :) because of the age old saying 'the grass is always greener on the other side' (i know it's a very, very broad perspective but that is what the basic criteria is) if you are supposed to be 'sitting and studying' then 'sitting and watching a movie' seems better...because once you have something, it's not that much fun...it's always better when it's just a little 'illegal' :) the temptation builds up, the fact that you're actually doing the activity seems more fun than the activity itself...
"i wanna do something fun" is the general outcry here...but there are so many damn conditions around that it just seems so far....sigh...
when somebody says "nobody understands me", I'd like to say to them "so, you really think anything is going to change once they do?"
people don't change. only your perceptions of them do.
this night sucks.
There comes a time in your life when you decide to go DTA ("Don't Trust Anybody")
It is a very productive and un-harming way to go…people might say "you're being a coward, you'll never learn anything or go anywhere if you can't let yourself trust people!!", all I can say is, I've learned enough, and 'gone' to some pretty excessive lows….so I think it's pretty wise to switch now.
Im not gonna fill this up with a sad story about my 'learning experiences' that involved trusting people, but they were very good lessons :)
Reminds me of a line from the 'Better Than Ezra' song 'overcome':-
"I'm a little bit wiser, I'm a little bit sadder, I'm a little bit less you might have guessed"
'wiser' is the keyword here….people suck. most people will always bring you down and turn out to be horrible liabilities and an utter waste of emotion…
To decide to take care of yourself before everyone else, is very, very productive…because nobody else is gonna do it, and if anybody does want to do it, they should learn to take care of themselves before you too…
Being polite and nice is ok, but you can't keep justifying to yourself that the other person needs your help, in most cases they don't, and you're just weakening them by giving it to them…
<rant rant>
there are no emotions attached to anything....you can't bring despair into anyone Else's life if they're not interested in being affected by you...neither can you make someone happy...
a person is happy, or sad, out of their own accord...there is no 'bad' situation...i choose to not feel bad about the bloody blasts because im not really affected...and i refuse to use them as a conversation starter.
"she/he makes me so happy" and "she/he makes me so sad" are synonymous to "i choose to be petty about every little thing he/she does and to believe that these things make me happy/sad"
it's one big ball of fuzzy...'love' or 'tension' or 'happiness' is never in the air...you feel, what you want to feel...nobody really cares so much about upsetting you...you're upset because you choose to be...
create your illusion...and live in it...like we all do...and it's a good thing.
on a daily basis, all of us humans choose to give ourselves tonnes of more importance about things that aren't that important...
