2 posts tagged “friends”
Many times we find ourselves facing a situation where we have to say something to someone, or ask them a certain question but to due to the nature or content of the query or implication, we can't do so without offending them….
Thus we have to 'phrase' the matter in such a way that makes us look different than what our mind is really feeling.
I don't want to put this whole muddle under the umbrella of 'diplomacy' because it isn't exactly that, a person being diplomatic does so to reach some pre-determined ends….using the 'diplomacy' as their means….
But a person faced in this 'situation', usually really wants to say what's on his/her mind….but has to choose otherwise to avoid an argument.
If everyone spoke the absolute truth, nobody would be able to stand their 'friends'.
As college ends, I see a lot of people around me desperately trying to 'do something fun'.
People seem to be in the phase of 'make some awesome memories' now...
Let's observe what 'routine' means, a routine is what we all follow, now 'following a routine' doesn't sound like a very fun thing to do…but it is something you have to do, it is unavoidable and inevitable.
When in college, we follow a routine of classes, other activities like eating out, going for movies…these are all part of your routine…
As a crack addict you follow the routine of getting your fix, and working towards your next one..
As a beggar, you follow the routine of going to your usual places for alms…
As a hippie 'spiritualist' traveler (say, in Goa, or Pune's Koregaon Park) you follow the routine of doing your yoga, your meditation, sitting around at your usual place and having tea, etc etc…
After college, your routine can be anything from 'looking for a job' to 'cooking up new excuses everyday for your mother as to why you don't have a job yet'
If you're an avid clubber…dressing up, picking a place to go to, dancing around, is your routine...
You are never free, and by that I don't mean 'bound' in a any way, you will choose a routine, whatever suits you (even one's that don't suit you, due to the need for money, or peer pressure)
A routine essentially means a set of activities you do, repeatedly…with little change…and all this sounds very boring…but it's not, let's see why...
In this routine, whatever you choose to follow…there is one element that is ever changing, the human element, because whatever routine you might choose to follow, this routine, or parts of it, are followed by others, thus you tend to interact with these others and become closer to some…
Thus your routine becomes less tiring, the monotony is not what your mind focuses on…"That's what friends are for".
These are what we call 'friends', you'll make some friends in high school, you'll make some in college, and you'll make some during your work hours when you get a job…
Maybe you even won't make too many friends, you can say that your routine then consists of 'doing everything to avoid people' :)
So these 'friends', they help us create 'memories', memories for some can be those of times during their routine in the form of "fun times in class" or "fun times at work" (which generally consist of everything besides 'studying' and 'working', well, as I mentioned, that's what friends are for)
So when you have to leave, after college…or high school…or any of these routines…there's really no point cribbing about it.
We all know that it's not realistically possible to keep everybody in your life from your previous routines, I'm in touch with very few high school friends I care to stay in touch with, same is going to happen with college…you choose favorites…most of the time according to convenience, and how much ever you might deny it, need/use (we are all businessmen at heart looking out for our own interests).
But the point here is, getting overly attached to people from your old routines is futile…even more futile is trying to create 'last minute memories'…
The Friends we make are the byproducts of the routines we follow, we know them and care to interact with them directly because of the routine we choose to follow…
So when we choose to switch the routine (it happens over time by itself, in most cases…) we are inevitably going to have to 'shed' some friends…why see it as a catastrophic event?
