2 posts tagged “sad”

you see it often in movies, there's some kind of a 'house party' going on, and the lead actress decides to just go to the roof/terrace to 'get away from it all', usually seen feeling cold hugging herself looking out towards the night...wind teasing her (generally blond) hair a bit, and here she meets the lead actor, who too, seems to have come here, much before her, to 'get away from it all'..they end up talking about things, and how their life sucks, and then one of them says something on the lines of :- "sometimes you just got to <insert cliche phrase here> " while looking at the other or out to the night..if they're looking out to the night, right about now the speaker of the dialogue would look at the other and smile....

here's the start to a beautiful romance....

now, that doesn't happen too often at real parties!! first of all,the reason you'd go to a party nowadays is to be with the people you came with, and there's no way the scum are gonna let you get away and 'lone' about on a creepy terrace (especially if you're a girl, come on, you definitely have more concerned friends than that!) and if one was so keen to 'get away from it all', one wouldn't come to a party, unless you plan to lone about and find someone...i don't go to parties without my ipod tucked away somewhere so if i need to 'lone about' i can sure as hell do so without getting absolutely bored...because trust me, nobody cares to 'get away from it all' when 'it' is what they came for in the first place...

this, doesn't really happen:- 'loner finds loner and they both live happily for some time' (im not too fond of the words 'ever after')

how the hell does a loner find a loner? if you're going to parties to find 'loners' you're hardly one yourself!!

that's why we love movies so much, they're definitely one of the strongest sources of 'hope' for generations of people looking for guidance...

i was inspired to write this after/while watching 'august rush', what a beautiful movie...i haven't felt 'smiling really wide', 'almost crying' and 'clawing with despair' in the same movie for a long time, and the music...ah...i personally couldn't keep my hands from moving with it like an impassioned possessed composer :) im not a 'prodigy' like the boy but i loved and felt whatever he did...I'd recommend it to everyone.

every part in the movie where there was beautiful music involved is etched into my brain and makes me smile wide thinking about it...im gonna be making some someday for sure, and this movie can be stated as one of my inspirations :)

<break>

so i wrote the above text, most of it...while the electricity was out (i have a laptop, but my modem needs power) and while i took a nap after writing it, i thought of a million other things...

why, does it so happen, that people say "i wish i had someone to talk to", this line is usually said by people who have had myriad relationships in the past and thus always had someone to talk to...frankly speaking, from the point of view of someone who's barely been in any relationships...i don't feel the absolute 'need' to talk to someone...it's not a need, it arises as a 'hey man this is in me i wonder what he /she thinks about my thoughts' thing....

most relationships, tend to weaken people, and they let this happen...always having someone around, always getting pampered...and then when you break up it's the hardest thing in the world because you got so bloody attached...and your 'pain' keeps getting thrown around at other people's heads when you're in their company, sheesh...you get conditioned to getting something and as the 'flow' stops you start acting like 'that's it, my world has ended', well man, you weren't always together, get back to how it was before him/her.

The phrase 'im gonna miss you/love you forever' is something even the speakers of which realize within a few months, that doesn't make sense...it's mostly uttered in a 'third person' format (im gonna love him/her forever) for other people to hear and go 'awwww', well most of the things you'd say to make others go 'awww' are bullshit...it's the human tendency to make other humans think that they're the best, the best 'girlfriend/boyfriend' in this case...someone who'd 'love their significant other forever'.

most of the time when you give utmost importance to the pains in your life, think about what you would feel if someone else was telling you about it, you're the only one who cares about and understands your 'pain', nobody else wants to listen, nobody else cares, and if you look into it, you might just realize that you too are just wasting time over it. most of the time. oh bollocks you'll never realize it....

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Now playing: Aqualung - Brighter Than Sunshine
posted with FoxyTunes   

some time ago i was this:- (just about an hour ago)

P P P P P P P P P P >>>>>>>> me :) <<<<<<<<< P P P P P P P P P P

P = people, choots....everyone is a choot...

happily keeping my distance from people, telling myself "yeah man, everyone should be able to do this, a man's depression is only his own, it's a selfish feeling, coming from 'she doesn't love me' and 'nobody likes me' and other 'me' related things, you jsut have to stop being selfish and self centered to be happier"

and right now, im in a 

P P P P P P P P P P P P P P>>>>>>> me :(<<<<<<<<<<<< P P P P P P P P P P P

and it's not because of the distance from people, it's because of the distance from her!! bleh...i want her motherfucking bastard argh!! and now my thoughts are "fuck everybody, i want her!! who gives a shit about anything else? i want to have her for myself, i want to be the one to make her happy, of course i want her to be happy, but with me fuckin hell!! nobody matters!! yeah im selfish and that's the only sane feeling in my head right now!!"

all these 'people', they're all dispensable, copies of each other, struggling to be noticed...but she is a weight i can't bear to see, erm, weighed down on herself....she's my weight...this doesn't make general sense..hmmm....

ok im done. and yes sir here's another thing im probably gonna regret writing......

mood swings man mood swings, and it swings like hell.....to make oneself 'happy' by force is some useless shit....

i want somethign that's all mine....

MINE i say!!

i just love 'pure shores', what a song!!!